9 foods you shouldn’t eat if you’re planning to bottom tonight

A lot of people think that if you’re planning to bottom for a guy that you’ll only be able to eat ice cubes on your date, but that really isn’t true. It actually takes hours or even days for the food you eat to turn to poop and for it to be ready to leave your body.

So, rather than worry about the food you’re eating that night, it might be worth looking at the foods to avoid in the morning or even the night before a big session.

Of course, if you’re very concerned about debris in your system or you’re a complete, white-glove bottom then douching is pretty much your best option for making sure no accidents happen during anal sex.

Here are a few of the biggest bottom no-nos!

1. Hummus.

Sorry guys but unless you wanna be farting all night it’s best to stay clear from the Chickpea favourite. Nothing kills the moment than a back end blow out!

2. Chickpeas.

In fact stay clear from these all together. Chickpeas – the main ingredient in Hummus is the culprit.

3. Beans.

You know the rhyme – Beans beans good for your heart the more you eat the more you fart…

4. Fizzy drinks.

Carbonated drinks will blow up your intestine like a balloon . So if you’re out drinking it’s best to stay clear from fizzy sodas for your mixers as well as beers and ales. Perhaps stick with the wine or fruit juices for your mixers. So if you don’t want a carbonated cheeky squeak – lay of the colas.

5. Green veg.

Cruciferous vegs like Cauliflower, Brussels, and Kale are known to cause the digestion system to become gassy as it can take longer for your body to digest.

6. Oats not so good.

Although oats are generally good for your digestion they are know to cause flatulence.

7. Meats.

So here’s the thing meats, particular red meat sit in the stomach and intestines for ages. They take a really long time to digest – this can lead to bloating and well gas…

8. Meds.

Some medications can cause diarrhea. Make sure that your the pills you’re taking don’t cause the runs. Speak to your GP if you’re on prescribed meds that might cause you probs downstairs. Don’t stop taking any medications that you’ve been prescribed without talking to medical professional first.

9. Coffee.

Forget that after dinner coffee. Too much of the stuff could send you running to the loo with the runs.

Despite what you might think, the food that you eat directly before a hot session in the bedroom, probably won’t affect your ability to bottom. However a large meal will probably make you sleepy, just think about sleepy you feel after Christmas dinner!

So if you’re planning an all-nighter it’s best to lay off any food that will make you tired.