There are so many questions that people have, especially when their information comes through the grapevine. So rather than letting myth turn to fact, we’ll answer them for you.
Do gay men need to wear tampons or adult diapers? Where to begin. Do you mean receptive gay men? I.e. Bottoms? Because you know it’s not just gay men who bottom.
So the question is more likely to be: “Do people who have anal sex need to wear tampons?” And the answer is nope. Not if you’re doing it right. Yes, there is a right and a wrong way of having anal sex. Misinformation and myths like this can lead to the idea that you can tell if a guy is straight or gay by giving him an anal examination.
We’ve all heard the story of the guy that had anal sex so much that he couldn’t control his bowels and so he needed to wear a tampon to stop the poop. Whether this guy actually existed we’ll never know, maybe he did. But guys who are having regular receptive sex shouldn’t have any issues in controlling their bodily functions.
So what is “regular anal sex”, well it’s important to know two things about up-the-butt sex. Time and Lube are your friends. In fact, they’re best buds.
One of the most important muscles is your external sphincter. It like the main ring. It’s a powerful muscle that stops stuff from getting out (and in) but like any muscle, it can be damaged (and even better strengthened).
This and the lining of the rectum are delicate and if you’re too rough or haven’t prepared yourself properly, well you can cause yourself damage, which is why it’s important to communicate how you’re feeling with your “top”.
Doctor Rick Viney, a consultant urological surgeon at BMI The Priory and BMI Edgbaston hospitals in Birmingham, told us that “Rapidly and forcefully overstretching the anus can tear the anal sphincter which can result in the need for surgical repair. The sphincter can be gently dilated over a short period of time using devices like a plug or a gradual increase in the number of fingers inserted.”
The butt, will after dilation return to its normal size shortly after sex. If you’ve done something more extreme, like fisting, it may take a longer time to go back to normal.
But what if you have lots and lots of anal sex.
Well, regularly having anal sex isn’t really enough for you to need you to wear a tampon. Naturally, if you’re having a lot of sex, you might find your hole does become looser, but you shouldn’t lose control altogether.
If you do find yourself or feel that you’ve become looser, there are exercises that can help you retain a tight ring. The NHS recommends a series of exercises. In one they suggest engaging your muscles like you are trying to stop a fart. They write,
“Try squeezing and lifting that muscle as tightly as you can, as if you are worried that you are about to leak. Your buttocks, tummy and legs should not move much at all. You should be aware of the skin around the back passage tightening and being pulled up and away from the chair. Really try to feel this. You are now exercising your anal sphincter”.
There’s a way of holding that feeling for as long as you can. Like imaging that your sphincter muscle is a lift and that you’re taking it to the fourth floor and holding it while the passengers get out and then back down again.
If you can’t go to the fourth, try the 2nd!
You get the idea.
The best thing about exercising these muscles is that you don’t need an expensive gym membership or even proper work out clothes. You can do them in your car at the traffic lights or on your way to work on the train. No one will know. Unless you turn to your fellow passenger and tell them. We suggest you don’t do this. It might freak them the F out.