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There are two kinds of people in this world, the hideaways and the displayers and there’s nothing wrong with either – but for some of us the feeling that we need to hide away our sex toys is pretty ingrained and most likely comes from a place of shame. Whilst this isn’t particularly sex-positive, sometimes you need to hide that stuff away from prying eyes. Especially if you have nosey housemates or family coming to stay.

We’re not all like Christian Grey who can afford a designated playroom with all the toys and equipment laid out ready for use, but we can all likely afford a designated play cupboard or even a couple of shelves in an existing closet.

It goes without saying, you really shouldn’t store them clambered on-top of each other. First of all, some sex toy materials will actually interact with others and cause a melting effect. Second, if you don’t let your toys have their own breathing space, it could cause germs and bacteria to thrive – especially if you’re not cleaning them thoroughly. Thirdly you want to be able to see what you got and want easier access to them.

This is how not to store your sex toys. I mean who can find what they’re looking for!

Easy access

Like everything in sex, easy access is a must. Whether you keep your toys in an ottoman at the end of the bed or in your bedstand’s bottom draw, it’s important that access to them is easy and fluid. This is especially important if you use toys with your partner or other people. Although there is something to be said about anticipation and playing a little waiting game as you decide on the right toy for the right occasion.

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Give your sex toys room to breathe

You want to make sure that all your toys have room to breathe. It’s really important that they don’t touch. Especially if you’ve just washed them and they’re slightly damp. Damp sex toys run the risk of becoming mouldy or having spores of bacterium multiple on them, which could lead to an infection.

Sort the toys into categories

how to organise your sex toys

All the butt stuff together, all the cock stuff together. By having the toys sorted this way, you’ll be able to find what you’re looking for much quicker, meaning you’ll be spending more time using them rather than rooting through the mess. Organisation is sexy. Honestly.

Cool dark and dry

Cool, dark places are best for your sex toys. Don’t let them sit by a heater or radiator or get bleached out by sunlight.

Standing to attention

Make sure that the space you have is tall enough to let your standing toys stand… Most butt plugs and dildos have an end on which they stand. If you can let them sit like this as resting them of their sides can lead to them becoming deformed. If this isn’t possible laying them out, on tissue paper or a dry kitchen wipe is okay.

Bag it and tag it

Depending on how long you go between plays, you may want to bag your sex toys in a simple tote bag or cloth bag. Bags will also stop the goodies from becoming dusty. These Drawstring shoe bags are perfect for the job and cheap as chips.

Mr. Man

Hide it away completely

If you’ve got to hide your toys away, then you can hide them away in boxes that used to have another product in it. This wise user on Reddit said that when he was younger that he hid his toys inside an old Xbox 360 box.

Display it

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If you’ve got a toy that looks incredible, like a glass or a moulded metal toy, display it and why not, after all, it is your home! Some glass and metal toys can look like artwork in their own right. You could go all out and buy a glass display case for your most treasured toys, or pop them on a shelf. Don’t forget to give them a dusting once a week – but don’t use polish. The fewer chemicals around items you’re going to stick inside you, the better.

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